challenges and difficulties
Derek both yearns for, and fears, being emotionally vulnerable with others and experiencing deep emotional intimacy. Trusting others and letting himself be known in a deep way does not come easily to John, and sexual inhibitions may result from this. John Derek is very self-protective and may be compulsively secretive. Learning to relinquish control in personal relationships, and to be completely open, is an important task for Derek.
He may have nebulous but ever-present guilt and fears that are difficult to pinpoint or eradicate. It is as if John Derek does not trust Life itself, and is always seeking ways to defend himself from its dangers and its unknowns. John Derek must learn to overcome his ingrained habit of discouragement and anxiety, and to see the world more as a friendly place than as a treacherous one.
John has an inner conflict between idealism, hope, and faith in the future versus doubt and oppression by limitations and practical realities. John Derek needs to develop discipline and patience in order to achieve his aspirations. Derek will grow by learning to accept frustration and to persevere in spite of obstacles.
John Derek strives and struggles a great deal with his ideals or spiritual aspirations. He may go through periods of self-denial, asceticism, and in-depth study of religious philosophy and spiritual practices, or he may lose heart and become cynical about religious ideals; however, he can never quite divorce himself from his idealistic concerns.
He is inclined to be somewhat timid and afraid to start something on his own, preferring that someone else tells him what to do. John Derek can easily be deterred from pursuing his goals, making his advancement in life rather slow.
Now we will discuss patterns of behavior which John Derek instinctively and habitually reverts to when under stress - a mostly subconscious process that he is apt to over indulge in because it is so familiar and hence easy for him. The direction John Derek needs to follow in order to develop balance, greater awareness, and wholeness is also described.
When under stress, John Derek is apt to shut off the flow of his emotions and ignore his needs and feelings in order to do what he perceives as his duty or simply what the practical realities of the situation dictate. This can lead to a certain rigidity and inflexibility. If overdone, self-control, self-discipline, or an exaggerated concern over what society, family or others expect of him, makes life more of a burden than an adventure.
Fostering his tender, caring, feminine, and nurturing aspects is an important step in John Derek's growth. John Derek needs to learn how to nourish and lovingly tend to both himself and others. Letting himself be taken care of sometimes is okay!
It is in relationships that are more than superficial or casual - in particular in cases where John Derek has merged emotionally, legally, or financially with another person - that he is most likely to wrestle with these issues. Derek will see these issues arise in close partnerships of any kind, especially when there is a mutual dependency involved. Dealing with in-laws, inheritances, and legal matters involving joint custody, shared assets, and resources is also a part of this.
The following are specific activities that will support John Derek in his growth. These may or may not feel natural to Derek, and he may initially resist or feel awkward about them, but they are crucial to his path to wholeness.
John Derek's path to wholeness involves confronting his dark and hidden recesses, bringing them out into the open, and transforming himself in the process. Healing abilities develop as a result of Derek's willingness to experience and transform deep emotions such as grief, anger, and pain. Furthermore, bringing light to the darkness and pain in the world without becoming overwhelmed by it is a significant challenge for John.
Astrological factors in this Astro Profile section:
Saturn in Scorpio
Saturn in 12th house
Jupiter Square Saturn
Saturn Square Neptune
Saturn Opposition Sun/Jupiter
N. Node in Cancer
N. Node in 8th house
N. Node Conjunct Pluto