challenges and difficulties
Payne either overvalues or undervalues his possessions and assets. He can also go to extremes in dealing with bodily needs and desires, being either hedonistic or ascetic. John Payne may deny himself sensual pleasure and enjoyment of the fruits of his labors. He may also be stingy and unable to give freely. Many times John Payne feels that he does not have "enough" to make him feel secure, regardless of how much (money, insurance, etc.) he has!
His attitude toward religion, philosophy, and politics is very conservative and possibly narrow or rigid. On the one hand, John Payne may believe in nothing that is speculative or intangible, requiring proof for any idea presented to him. Each idea is thoroughly and systematically examined. On the other hand, John may tenaciously cling to his grand philosophical or metaphysical beliefs and opinions, refusing to modify them or to be open and receptive to others' insights and perspectives.
His overall outlook on life is serious, and John Payne may feel that life or God will punish him if he does not watch his step!
John Payne has a serious outlook on life and a tendency to dwell on his own flaws as well as those of everyone else. Payne may be rather reserved with people and may find it difficult to express himself, thereby leaving a more negative impression than he intended.
John Payne tends to experience inner conflicts between his responsibilities and his desires. Payne may give preference to duties over desires, which makes it very difficult for him to be truly happy.
His disposition is somewhat melancholic and John Payne may have a rather pessimistic outlook. John has an inner need to be alone and to engage in deep meditation. John Payne takes life seriously and may have been taught early on to learn from his mistakes.
Since he lacks the capacity to adapt, John Payne tends to be rebellious and fight hard against oppression. This could even lead to violent incidents, so John should try to keep his temper at bay. He may have to work extremely hard and handle a great many responsibilities.
Now we will discuss patterns of behavior which John Payne instinctively and habitually reverts to when under stress - a mostly subconscious process that he is apt to over indulge in because it is so familiar and hence easy for him. The direction John Payne needs to follow in order to develop balance, greater awareness, and wholeness is also described.
Seeking harmonious interpersonal relationships, cooperation, and togetherness, as well as the desire to please or appease other people, are drives that come very naturally to John Payne - so much so that he seeks them out at his own expense. When he is under stress, Payne tends to look outside himself for approval or answers, and he leans on others too much. Therefore, developing self-reliance, and the courage to look inwardly for answers and forge his own path through life is a key factor in his self-development.
John Payne is often tempted to be less than completely straightforward about his intentions or desires, and he can become enmeshed in a quagmire of "little white lies". Stark honesty - both inward and toward others - is the only way out! This, however, leads to the need to confront some of Payne's most deeply ingrained fears, such as "what if they do not like me?" and "what if I have to go through this alone?".
John Payne needs to cultivate his ability to be assertive, take initiative and act on his own behalf. Directness and self-reliance are imperative.
It is in relationships that are more than superficial or casual - in particular in cases where John Payne has merged emotionally, legally, or financially with another person - that he is most likely to wrestle with these issues. Payne will see these issues arise in close partnerships of any kind, especially when there is a mutual dependency involved. Dealing with in-laws, inheritances, and legal matters involving joint custody, shared assets, and resources is also a part of this.
Astrological factors in this Astro Profile section:
Saturn in Taurus
Saturn in 9th house
Saturn Conjunct Sun/Mercury
Saturn Opposition Moon/Jupiter
Saturn Conjunct Mercury/MC
Saturn Conjunct Pluto/N. Node
N. Node in Aries
N. Node in 8th house