challenges and difficulties
Mika takes his personal relationships so seriously that they may seem more like work, constant effort and compromise, rather than a free and enjoyable sharing experience. He may feel that relationships in general require more of him than they are worth, and Mika enters into any close relationship cautiously and conscientiously. Mika also fears entrapment in close relationships.
He may have vague but ever-present feelings of guilt and fear that are difficult to pinpoint or eradicate. It is as if Mika does not trust Life itself, and is always seeking ways to defend himself from its dangers and its unknowns. Mika must learn to overcome his ingrained habit of discouragement and anxiety, and to see the world more as a friendly place than as a treacherous one.
He is suspicious of groups, crowds, and social organizations. Mica Penniman is quick to pick up on social charades and insincerity and avoids the limelight and glamour. Mika is direct and to the point in speech and manner, stubborn and inflexible, and often unwilling to communicate his innermost feelings and thoughts.
His emotional life is likely to be somewhat strained and he has a tendency toward pessimism. Mika may not feel as close in his relationships to his loved ones as he would like to, and Mika may find it difficult to give and receive love.
Mika dislikes tense or frustrating situations and has a strong desire to free himself from them. Acting quickly at times, Mika suddenly overcomes his inner inhibitions. Mika also has the ability to aptly grasp difficult situations and to use them for his advancement.
Basically shy, Mica Penniman tends to be somewhat inhibited in love relationships and may feel uncomfortable or awkward expressing his love for someone. Mika longs for love relationships and dreams about love, but is also inclined to torment himself because of a seeming lack of affection.
Mika tends to be somewhat insecure and uncertain about his direction in life. Frequently plagued by doubt and fear, he is inclined to worry a lot. Because Mica Penniman lacks the confidence to fight back, he may allow himself to become the victim of others.
Now we will discuss patterns of behavior which Mika instinctively and habitually reverts to when under stress - a mostly subconscious process that he is apt to over indulge in because it is so familiar and hence easy for him. The direction Mika needs to follow in order to develop balance, greater awareness, and wholeness is also described.
Mika needs to take what he has learned (either through formal education or his own questing and life experience) and share it with others, communicate it or express it in a way that can benefit others. Knowledge and understanding, which does not enhance either Mika's quality of life or that of persons in his world, is of little real value. Putting Mica Penniman's understanding, philosophy, and convictions into practice in his daily relationships, and in the multiple choices he makes every day, will enable Mika to really test his belief system and discover more about life.
When under stress, Mika is apt to seek refuge in imagining that the grass is greener elsewhere, rather than working with what is at hand. Mika needs to cultivate his ability to live in the present!
It is in relationships that are more than superficial or casual - in particular in cases where Mika has merged emotionally, legally, or financially with another person - that he is most likely to wrestle with these issues. Mica Penniman will see these issues arise in close partnerships of any kind, especially when there is a mutual dependency involved. Dealing with in-laws, inheritances, and legal matters involving joint custody, shared assets, and resources is also a part of this.
The specific habits which are likely to hold Mika back, or which he is prone to overdo, especially during stressful periods, include:
Being bound to past events and experiences because of his desire to belong, deep attachments to family and the familiar (even if they are neither nourishing nor helpful), the desire to nurture or be nurtured by others, and a strong resistance to cutting the umbilical cord.
Escapism through fantasy, intoxicants, or passive, vicarious activities (television, movies, etc.), waiting for a miracle instead of taking constructive steps to help himself, aimlessness or an inability to make and keep commitments, and self deception regarding other people. Mika has a tendency to be a martyr.
Astrological factors in this Astro Profile section:
Saturn in Libra
Saturn in 12th house
Saturn Conjunct Pluto
Saturn Conjunct Moon/MC
Saturn Conjunct Mercury/Uranus
Saturn Conjunct Venus/Neptune
Saturn Conjunct Neptune/MC
N. Node in Gemini
N. Node in 8th house
N. Node Opposition Moon
N. Node Opposition Neptune