Havelock Ellis
in Relationships

He is not easily moved by emotional displays and can be curiously detached from his own emotions and those of others. It is almost as if he could turn his feelings on and off at will; Havelock should be careful not to leave the switch "off" too often, for he could easily become too impersonal. Family relationships and attachments are not as important to him as they are to most people and Ellis often considers his friends closer to him than his blood relatives. Certainly, Ellis' sympathy and concern extends much beyond his immediate family. In his personal relationships, Havelock Ellis insists upon a certain amount of independence and the freedom to pursue friendships with as many people, of both sexes, as he chooses. Havelock does not appreciate a jealous, possessive partner.

Havelock Ellis feels comfortable in an atmosphere that is open and experimental, and he has little taste for convention and tradition.

His own feelings and emotions are something of an enigma to Havelock, and it is often difficult for him to share with others what he is feeling.

Havelock Ellis frequently withdraws from contact with the world, and needs a healing, peaceful environment in order to blossom and come out of his.

Ellis identifies with the oppressed, disenfranchised or underdog in any situation and he wants to help them or care for them in some way.

Some rather acute fears of being excluded, rejected, left out in the cold or separated from loved ones can make Havelock Ellis either extremely cautious about getting close to people or clingy toward whoever gives him any warmth or security. Havelock Ellis tends to withhold and clamp down on many of his feelings and craves nurturing and security, perhaps feeling that they are unacceptable or will never be satisfied. Learning to be open and trust others to nurture him is important to him. His earliest years, especially Ellis' relationships with his mother, will determine whether Havelock Ellis will overcome his fears or retreat behind a mask of self-sufficiency and indifference.

Havelock has intense desires and feelings and his personal relationships are deeply emotional, passionate and often stormy and painful as well. Havelock Ellis has powerful magnetic relationships with those he cares about, and he could become emotionally obsessed by another person. His feelings can become so urgent and compelling that he behaves irrationally. Havelock Ellis undergoes periodic emotional upheavals and purging when he must break all ties with the past and begin anew.

Havelock Ellis seems to float above reality and has a very intense imagination. Havelock likes to daydream and is apt to have many wishes and illusions that rarely have a chance to materialize. He is guided by his feelings and seems to live in a world of his own.

In love relationships, Havelock Ellis seeks companionship and friendship with someone who is fun loving, playful and open to adventure and new experiences. He enjoys traveling together, meeting new people and making new friends. Honeymooning in a distant location appeals to Havelock, and he is also attracted to foreigners or people with diametrically different backgrounds than his own. Havelock Ellis supports his partner in taking risks and making positive changes, rather than preserving the status quo. He also very much wants a partner who will encourage his own aspirations and dreams. It is very important to Havelock that he have a spiritual or intellectual rapport with his love partner, perhaps more important than the emotional/physical aspect. Havelock Ellis is not especially sentimental and his love partner may feel that he is too casual and not serious or romantic enough.

Promoting beauty, the arts, or entertainment can make Havelock Ellis very happy. Havelock wants to contribute something positive and loving to the world at large and he wants to be recognized for his beauty, artistic gifts, or loving generosity. Havelock Ellis may "marry" his work - that is, being more involved in his career than in his private life. Ellis is a natural host or diplomat.

He is intensely amorous and attractive to the opposite sex, and is not inclined to friendly platonic relationships. There is a great deal of tension in his love relationships - often because Havelock Ellis puts his desires ahead of his partner's, and is impatient to have his love needs satisfied. The whole arena of love relationships, romance and sex is endlessly fascinating to Havelock Ellis and he is not happy without a love partner. Ellis can "burn himself out" by pouring so much of his energy into romance.

While he may seek loving relationships and an "everlasting" love, this is not easy for Havelock Ellis to find - or more precisely, to sustain. When Havelock becomes romantically involved with someone, either he or the other person will create rifts once a certain level of comfort and predictability has been achieved. Even if there is no outward break in the relationship, a certain emotional aloofness or dissatisfaction is apt to develop. This is because Havelock Ellis really wants both closeness and absolute freedom - a combination that is difficult to attain. However, if he does not at least attempt to honestly fulfill both of these urges, events seemingly out of the blue will wreak havoc in Havelock's closest relationships.

Astrological factors in this Astro Profile section:

Moon in Aquarius

Moon in 12th house

Moon Opposition Saturn

Moon Square Pluto

Moon Conjunct Neptune/MC

Venus in Sagittarius

Venus in 10th house

Venus Square Mars

Venus Quincunx Uranus